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| I went to Paris for the premiere vision in September, and I took this picture while I was there. |
Hello everybody,
Merry belated Christmas!! I went back home for two weeks and then spent Christmas with my in-laws. I'll have to admit the three days of food indulgence really put me into a position of having to go to the gym. But hey, it's okay.
Anyway. Today, I am writing a post to remind myself about the lessons I learned along the years. In case you don't know (I am sure no one is interested), I am about to be 25 in January. I reckon I could use this opportunity to reflect on myself and continue to be positive (hopefully) in life.
I wanted to think of 10 lessons but unfortunately I do not have that many. Perhaps at the age of 30 I can squeeze my little mighty brain and come up with more. Now I would have to stick to 7 small lessons. Here we go.
1. Deal with your emotions before dealing with your problems.
There is no secret that we are all humans and we all have emotions, I think it is absolutely normal - perhaps sometimes healthy - when we all let our emotions rant out a little. Often, emotions come with an event, or a problem behind them which triggered our emotions. For instance, I was angry at something someone did to me. But here is one thing that really help me. Before I jump to dealing with the problems, I try (at least give it a go) to deal with my mood first.
Frustration, anger, or betrayal. Maybe a mixture of all. I let myself to sit through the feelings and let them all come out. Especially anger, I do not want to say anything relentlessly just because I am furious. It's irresponsible. It is more okay if it's just frustration and sorrow. But whatever it is, let it come out.
After I calm down from my rage or sorrow. Then I can deal with the problem itself with a more matured mind and hopefully the problem would become less complicated when I am calmed down.
Admittedly, this is very hard to do. I often regret not doing it enough. But everything is a learning curve, and we will get there someday.
2. Don't make a decision when you are angry. Don't make a promise when you are happy.
Kind of continue the previous point about emotions. It is very helpful to not make a decision when you are angry. We often see people yell at each other and say something they thereafter regret. I do that sometimes, on a minor scale. We all hope we don't accidentally hurt people with things we say without thinking. On the contrary, do not make a promise when you are extremely happy. After you calm down from that emotional rollercoaster, you might regret it. It is quite harmless if it's just an impulse shopping, but sometimes people would promise big things they can't even cash them in.
3. Don't get defeated easily.
I think this is a bit of cliche and everyone knows about it. However, it can be quite hard to achieve. I've once read about the Learned helplessness theory, which is (wikipedia) behavior typical of a human or an animal and occurs where the subject endures repeatedly painful or otherwise aversive stimuli which it is unable to escape or avoid. After such experience, the organism often fails to learn or accept "escape" or "avoidance" in new situations where such behavior would likely be effective. In other words, the organism learned that it is helpless in situations where there is a presence of aversive stimuli, has accepted that it has lost control, and thus gives up trying.
I sometimes feel quite down because of things I couldn't achieve or things I hoped I could do better. And because failure is so painful I tend to avoid it or be really passive. But in my mind, I know that is part of my body mechanism and instincts. I can courage myself to give it another try. If I do my absolute best but can't reach it, then at least I have no regret. I can give myself a pad on my back knowing I am proud of myself.
I don't want to be cheesy but life really is a journey of choices and hoping we learned from our mistakes. In the next five years I will not get defeated easily.
4. Find the easiest thing to start with.
There are some underlying goals I want to reach in life besides my career. One of them is passing B2 French Test by the age 30. Why the age 30? Because I want to learn another new language after that. I have learned French for a couple months and since then I am only doing some reading at home. I tell myself one hour of the week I am going to study French.
It is not efficient, it is very slow, but I am going to do it. It is very hard to motivate myself at home with all the possible entertainment I can do. But I told myself to sit in front of the desk and find one thing that is the easiest I can do during the one hour. I am not aiming high, just the easiest.
In a couple of weeks, I find myself very familiar with French numbers, or how to introduce myself. That might seem dirt progress at all, and it will not take me to the B2 test. But I know I would have done nothing instead. So this method really helped me to at least build up a habit and make very small progress. And from the small start, it will hopefully set me off a good place and slowly getting better.
5. The more you do, the more you can do.
This was said by Anna Wintour, one of the my ultimate role models. The more you do, the more you can do. It encourages me to explore more in life. For example, I always have been studying fashion but you probably don't know I am also a certified Madarin Chinese teacher with a handful of certifications. I do not teach Mandarin as a full time job but I do freelance translation sometimes. I also learned the piano for over 10 years as well as being in a professional choir for 10 years.
At some point in life, maybe I will want to learn how to fly a plane or play the violin. Maybe learning some new languages will help me advance my career somehow, but learning more things is always good.
6. The world is so big and my problems are so small.
Human whines about almost everything. I do too. But sometimes, when I am so into all the complaints I've done. I would step back and think about not wasting my time at being angry to the world when I am blessed to live another day. Okay maybe it doesn't help much, but it is always good to think about how lucky I am and how I should appreciate what I have.
Grass is greener on the other side, technically there is only one person living 'better' out of the rest 7 billion people. And when I realise how lucky I am. I would want to help others and be more grateful for what I have.
7. Luck is the meeting of preparation and opportunities.
There is a say (I think?) of lucky people make their own luck. Maybe it's because lucky people see a lot of things as opportunities and they do not stop improving themselves. I have known many people who really are lucky to live with wealthy lives with literal zero effort in life. But I also truly believes that happiness can't be given, it can only be earned or found. Some people are lucky because they were born with privilege. But people who work hard and find their own luck are truly admirable.
Alright, that is everything I can remember for now. This might not be helpful to some of you. But if you find it helpful, then I am happy that I helped someone today.
Until next time,
I will see you soon.
Giselle
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大家好～～～好久不見
我在十二月初前回台灣兩週，之後回倫敦過聖誕節。
回到正題，今天寫這篇是要來分享進入20後半的人生中，一些看似不是非常重要，卻一路上伴隨著我，且雕塑著我的人格的一些價值觀。藉著寫下這篇文章，當作對自己的一個反省，且在接下來的日子裡，謙虛地繼續往前走。
本來想要想出十個，但是我實在是想不出來那麼多個 （真不可取）。我看看我奔三的時候寫不寫得出來哈哈。
以下七個 Small life lessons 來跟大家分享
一， 在處理問題之前，先處理情緒。
凡是人都有情緒，有脾氣，有眉眉角角。這些負面的情緒也可能隨時都會找上我們。適時的舒壓解放心靈也不外乎為古今中外凡人的健康行為。
往往在情緒來的時候，也伴隨著某種事件，或是某種問題。這個事件是“壓垮駱駝的最後一根稻草“，然後情緒排山倒海的淹沒理智。
在這種情況裡，有一個方法真的幫助我很多。就是在解決問題之前，先把情緒解決完，尤其是氣憤的情緒。在生氣的時候，千萬不能急著把問題解決，在情緒高漲的時候，很有可能會說出自己後悔的話，可能會影響自己的判斷力。
先讓不滿的感覺都散發完，可以哭，可以沮喪，可以狼狽。讓情緒稍微收拾一下，再來討論問題的所在。用冷靜的大腦，成熟的判斷，可以大幅減低問題的複雜度，也不會在事後後悔自己的言行。
但是，若要每次都能完美的做到，是有滿高的難度的。我們很常在受傷難過生氣的時候，就很急的想要解釋自己，想要一股腦地狂說。所以我也覺得這點要做到不容易。不過每件事都有必經的學習曲線，每一次有比上一次做得更好，就是進步了。
二。別在生氣的時候做決定，別再開心的時候給承諾。
接續上一點，我們在生氣的時候，做出來的決定可能是一時衝動的後果，比如一生氣就跟男友說要分手。在我們極度開心的時候，也不要亂給別人承諾，以免自己在事後兌不了現，這樣不僅打破了約定，還讓人感受不佳。
三。別輕易被擊垮。
好這點真的太老調重彈，你可能已經翻白眼了。但是這點真的很難做到，每天一大堆想放棄的事情，一大堆妥協跟選擇。。
心理學中常提到的：習得的無助。我們的大腦會再重複的挫折中選擇放棄，快的話，只需要六分鐘就能讓你放棄。如果一直告訴大家永不放棄的話，可能太過神化人性了，但是要如何去辨別何時該改變策略，何時該堅持下去，且不在下次嘗試的時候不被前一次的表現影響，是很重要的。
我有時候被沮喪淹沒，不相信自己的能力。挫折感很強烈，逃避是最簡單的，又可以拒絕面對現實。
我會在很想放棄的時候，再嘗試最後一次，如果真的做不到的話，那麼至少我沒有後悔。我也可以拍拍自己的肩膀，告訴自己盡力了，且為自已的勇氣驕傲。
雖然不想講的很噁心但是人生不外乎就是一連串的選擇。我們也都希望自己在這條路上多做了一些正確的決定，接下來五年我也會繼續的在這條路上小心奕奕的前進。
四。從最簡單的開始
今年我要去健身房，今年我要讀十本書，今年我要學日文，今年我要這樣，今年我要那樣。
在這些林林總總的年度目標之中，你我都明白執行率可以說是世紀低。
對我來說，我想要在三十歲之前考到一定程度的法檢，然後三十之後可以學個日文這類的。但是要在忙碌的生活中坐下來讀語言，是很困難的。所以我會從最簡單的開始。我現在能做的最簡單的是什麼，可能是第一課。那麼我就看第一課。
十天後我第一課可能看了十次，有什麼收穫嗎？或許沒有。但是我比十天前又往前一點點了。 這樣就夠了，這就是滴水成河，積沙成塔。
不論妳最後離目標有多遠，都比完全沒開始還要近得多了。
五。你做得越多，你能做的也越多
這句話是美國版的風尚雜誌總編輯安娜。溫圖說的。跟上一點有一點點的關聯性。
這個信條給我了很多的鼓勵，也覺得很多事情我應該想做就去做。
舉例來說，我在大三的時候用了空檔的時間考了商業華語教學的證照，還考了普通話。在上大學之前我還在專業的合唱團唱了十年。
也許在人生的某個階段，我會想學開飛機，或許我會想學小提琴。不論是什麼，多做多嘗試多學習，都是很好的事。
六。這世界太大，我的問題太小。
我們常常聽到有人怨天尤人，每一件大事小事芝麻雞毛綠豆都可以靠腰。我也不例外，出門在外只要一不順心，馬上打電話給姊妹抱怨，在訂燒肉餐廳吃到飽，邊吃邊抱怨。
但是我有時候會往後一坐，想想自己多麽的幸運，餐餐溫飽，頭上有個屋頂，沒有什麼真正的危機。
別人的生活都會看起來比你好，你有的煩惱別人也有。過日子，如果什麼都要比，會很難過的，比上不足，比下有餘。知足常樂，我有愛的人，也有人愛我。就很心滿意足了。
七。幸運是準備與機會的相遇。
有此一說（我覺得啦）幸運的人會為自己創造幸運。我深深的相信這一點，也有很深刻的體悟。可能是因為幸運地會把很多機會當做轉機且大展身手，幸運的事情會隨之而來。
我也認識很多人完全就是金湯匙，富二三代，這輩子沒工作過，自我中心，天真無邪。但是我真心相信快樂是不能被給予的，要自己尋找，自己獲得。有些人資質平庸卻一輩子穿金戴銀開直昇機。能讓人真心敬佩的卻是用自己的努力，創造自己的幸運的那群菁英。
以上大約七點可能不乏老調重彈，可能對你毫無幫助，但有一件事情你可以相信我。就是你在努力的時候，我也在，大家都在。
那我們下次見！
下一篇來寫倫敦工作紀錄！終於脫離學校開始上班了！！
Giselle
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| Early 2017 at Green park |
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”- Oscar Wilde. You must come across some variety of this “be yourself” tagline in articles and on social media every once in a while. The advice contained in these articles is deemed to be enlightening and remind us how unique and amazing each individual is or how we should disregard other people’s opinions and do whatever we wish —Because everything will be fine if you just “be yourself”.
There is nothing wrong with being yourself.
But what if someone doesn’t like themselves? What if someone is unhappy with their status quo? Or what if someone does not like how they look?
Are their thoughts and feelings not as valid as those blissfully happy with their situation? Should they feel ashamed because they would be labelled as people who don’t “love themselves”?
Often, people who dispense the advice encouraging people to “embracing themselves” are often people who have very little to concerns about their own lives. They are a barometer of success, they’re confident, good looking, perhaps wealthy people. It is very hard to imagine these successful people reach where they are by simply “being themselves”. If this “perfect and successful” person was to walk up to you, and reassure you your life was on the right track, to just be brave and “be yourself”, you’d no doubt appreciate this almost refreshing and reassuring advice. Clearly being yourself will lead to you becoming this person you have admiration for!
However now imagine, a person who does not meet the traditional standards of success deemed by society tells you to ‘be yourself’. You would no doubt feel somewhat uncomfortable about the advice, being yourself must now be a road to ruin. Essentially, the advice is consistent, but the reaction becomes wildly different.
Our subconscious reflects the person giving the advice onto the word ‘yourself’, essentially flipping the meaning from advice to ‘be yourself’ to advice to help you ‘be like me’.
The overwhelming trumpeting on the internet about “embracing yourself” has become yet another instance of aspiring to be like others, stopping people from actually focusing their efforts on achieving something new. Merely listening to successful people talking about how they are being themselves ignores that successful people may honestly be naturally driven, hungry and talented as ‘themselves’, but I hate to break the news: you may not be.
For a totally honest version of somebody being themselves, look no further than me. My first honest action as ‘myself’ would be to yell at my boyfriend for the third time in a week to do the laundry. Secondly, I’ll wear that one big hoodie I own with no bra and no trousers to do my grocery shopping. Finally, I’ll tell my parents I actually won’t attend their planned family reunion to pretend I care about some distant relatives I haven’t seen since I could walk.
Does it feel good? Certainly. Does it get me any closer to the aspirational lives of the wealthy and beautiful people who share the sentiment online? Absolutely not.Because this world doesn’t revolve around you and acting purely in self-interest, or the interest of always ‘being yourself’ without a plan to achieve, achieves nothing. Every day there are things you will not be happy about, but simply ignoring them in a quest to always speak truth to yourself stops you from ever taking action to change any of them.
Everything in life requires balance. We are at liberty to be ourselves as much as we wish, but JUST being ourselves simply will not get us very far.
As one example, the topic of physiques: What if someone doesn't like their appearance? Are they not allowed to feel insecure about it? Is being themselves staying exactly the way they are, or is being themselves listening to their displeasure and changing their life? Simply saying ‘Just be happy with yourself’ denies people the very human right to feel sad, to feel negative, and to feel anxious about themselves.
Instead of just being yourself and settling for the present, a healthier lifestyle is to not treat negative thoughts as something wrong that needs to be fixed. Instead, treat the thoughts and feelings as a fuel to improve yourself and become closer to the person you want to be. When people take ownership of their actions, they become more genuinely authentic as a person and never stop learning.
The notion to “just be yourself” encourages complacency, where we are told stop making changes and taking risks, or told to attempt a change is a betrayal of your ‘true self’, but is that really the best way to think?
Next time you see an article suggesting “just be yourself”, maybe keep in mind that you don’t need to ‘be yourself’ if you don’t want to… What’s the harm in wanting to be Emma Watson, after all?
See you guys later xx
Giselle
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為什麼你不需要“做自己”
網路上時常充斥著一堆所謂建設性文章，告訴這個世界上所有迷惘的青年少女：做 自 己。
別去理會別人的意見，別去理會反對的聲音，別去理會社會對人們所要求的行為。只要做自己，一切都會變得很好，你會過得開心很多。
做自己沒什麼不好的。
但是如果今天我就是不喜歡自己，就是不滿意自己的外表，就是什麼都不滿意那要怎麼辦。
許多給這種“做自己”建議的人，往往在人生裡已經沒有太多的“普通人的煩惱”，可能這群建議者已經是人生勝利組。意氣風發，滿懷自信，相貌堂堂，可能還口袋滿滿。我無法輕易地同意說，這群人是單單靠著做自己而走到他們所擁有的位置的。
舉例來說，如果有一位形象“成功且完美”的人跟你說：別擔心，你只需要真實的做你自己，這樣一切問題都會迎刃而解。過度的小心翼翼這樣人生會很辛苦的...(以下省略)。 你可能會想說喔好吧也是。但是如果今天有一位形象與社會所刻板要求的形象相差甚遠，所謂的魯蛇告訴你：做你自己就好啦。你的反應可能會相差很多，或許有些人還會想說：做什麼自己，照鏡子看看你的處境，笑死人了。但其實，這兩個人說的建議，是一模一樣的。
第一個人讓你的潛意識反映出人人羨慕地那種傲視群雄又唯有獨尊的形象，好像“我這麼做我也能跟你一樣”，但是第二個人你可能會心生反感想說：別把我跟你比。
就是因為有這種傾向，我認為網路上大量的做自己文章都錯失了能幫主閱讀者能在人生中前進的機會，這類型的文章內容也就喪失其價值。因為聽成功人士說他們怎麼做自己只會誤導讀者認為自己只要做自己也可以變得成功。但是這種情狀不會發生，不論目標是什麼，只做自己是不夠的。
如果我來分享我會怎麼“真的做自己”的話，首先我先跟男友大吼叫他去給我洗那坨衣服，看到就氣；再來穿超大件起球連帽上衣，裡面什麼也不穿褲子也不用穿的去路口買個菜；再來叫餐桌上滿嘴八卦的八婆閉嘴；再打電話給爸媽說自己不去家族聚會了，那些遠房親戚一天到晚只會探人隱私口沒遮攔管東管西，什麼面子也不用做了。老實說，以上這些事情，我偶爾也會做。
但是呢，大部分的情況下我不會做這種事。因為這個地球不是為我轉的，我也不是世界的中心，沒有每件事都要以我為優先。先撇去社會對人們的成就有多少的標準，就基本而言，有些標準是深刻在這個體制下的，比如基本禮貌，比如尊重，這些都是一個社會所運行一部分。每個人多多少少都得去改變，去迎合。不開心的事情可能很多，但是大家都得付出犧牲。因為這就是人生，生活就是這樣，小至你愛的餐廳關門，大到你男友掏光戶頭遠走高飛。
我相信這世上也有例外，但是就一般而言，大部分的人都沒有辦法在人生中“只做自己”。
當然這是一個如何找到平衡的過程。別讓擔憂影響你的生活，下定決心的話也別輕言放棄，仔細聽自己的聲音等等，這些都很好。作為自己的主人你想怎麼做自己都是你的決定。但是要是你“只”做你自己的話，那可能前面路途遙遠。
網路上關於做自己的正面與鼓勵算是接近排山倒海的程度了，只是大部分的這類文章，沒有辦法真正的幫助有需要的人，反而傳達了相當片面且不適用於每個人的建議。
如果撇開社會面來說，談談更膚淺一點的，如果一個人對自己的外表不滿意，難道一個人不能被允許對自己的外表有不安全感嗎？
比起做自己，我更傾向於了解自己的短處且試圖增進自己，不管是個性還是外表，理解自己想要改變的地方，進而去用自己的步調慢慢行動，對我的個性來說，更有良好的影響。透過理解自己的不足之處而變成更好的人，我認為這才是能長久有正面效果的作法。
當然我也很歡迎不同意這些看法的人，畢竟你的人生只有你才能作主，只要清楚的知道說所有的決定也會帶來相對應的結果即可。
希望我有清楚的提出一點關於網路上充斥著做自己文章的看法，你要不要做自己或是要怎麼做自己，端看個人。
感謝收看～我們下次見～～（揮手下降）
Giselle
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| Androgyny Magazine July 2017 |
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對於時尚雜誌，我一直有很複雜的情感，幾乎可以說是衝突的情感。對這個領域來說，我根本是個門外漢，也沒有相關的學歷。但是我知道我當年之所以會去唸時尚行銷，就是因為我當時對時尚雜誌很有興趣，因為相關個科系很少，我在沒有多少選擇的情況下，就進了時尚行銷跟管理的這條路。到現在我還是很喜歡這個選擇，因為我擅長商科的東西，但是這也沒有阻止我對時尚雜誌的喜愛。可能一方面是因為興趣，一方面是有這個巧合。在我的大學以及研究所的日子裡，我做過兩個雜誌的企劃，一個是Ｍore，以城市為基礎的雜誌，我們做的這個版本是以紐約市為主題的。另一個是我幾個月前做的Blurred，是個去挑戰性別界限的雌雄同體時尚為主的雜誌。
現在往回看，有很多可以改進的空間，也有很多缺點，但是我想這也是一個好處，看得到自己的缺點，才有繼續往上的空間。這個去體驗學習曲線的過程，我很享受。
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| content page |
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| featured designer |
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| featured designer |
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| the last page of Blurred |
The most recent magazine project I did was one of the unit in my course called collaborative unit, where you team up with your chosen team members and come up with a project that is student-led with a supervisor. One of my friend was an editor in Vogue Thailand and she came up with the idea of an androgyny magazine. We all thought it was really unique and fun. Our supervisor is the course leader of fashion journalism and criticism, and he confirmed that there was no magazine within the same realm being made yet.
The difficult bit started from day one, how do we define androgyny, it is a little bit obscure. Androgyny is not uni-sex, androgyny is not men dress up like women or vice versa. Androgyny is where the features that identify genders are unseen or unobservable, it is probably closer to genderless, but not quite exactly.
However, once we defined (kinda) androgyny, what does that mean? and how does it become the theme of the magazine? How is this idea perceived and what does it represent? There are so many questions unanswered and we were sure about it. In the end, we decided to divide the magazine into four sections: Transcendence, Revitalisation, Ambiguity and Liberation.
The idea of androgyny is showing the gender fluidity and the ambiguity of genders. Within the four sections we contacted a very long list of artists, fashion designers, photographers, graphic designers and makeup artists. Their work and collections become the content of the magazine, and the magazine were able to deliver the messages of androgyny under different categories and through many forms of arts. We also conducted interviews with the artists and present them in the magazine. I thought it was impossible to make it 90 pages, but we somehow made it. Forgot to mention that we had about two months to make it from scratch. That was a handful, and it was just one of the units in that semester.
At the end, we were able to pull of something we are very proud of, a unique and a new magazine exploring the boundary of genders. In the last two pages, we put a semicolon, meaning that this is not the end of the androgyny fashion. And a quote saying: "Androgyny is not trying to manage the relationship between the opposite; it is simply flowing between them".
It was so nice to see Blurred become one hard copy and all of us in the team will always share the same achievement. There were really rough times, there were times we thought we will never see the end nor to imagine the outcome. And now we see it, we are in a much happier place.
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最近期的雜誌企劃叫做Blurred，意指為已模糊的，這個企劃是第二學期某一堂課的一個作業，這個企劃可以讓學生自由發揮，然後會配一個指導教授幫助這個企劃。跟我同組的一個同學之前在雜誌社工作過（我之前也在雜誌社上班），他提出了做一本關於雌雄同體時尚的一本雜誌。當時的指導教授是我們學校的時尚新聞與批判的課主任，他告訴我們說這個類型的雜誌還沒有在市場上，所以我們做了很多市場調查阿，然後同時做了很多研究。
第一個關卡就非常困難，所謂的雌雄同體時尚是什麼，它不是中性，它也不是一個性別打扮得像另一個性別。定義很複雜，而且許多設計師以及時尚界的專家也無法篤定地說出一個定義。簡單來說，雌雄同體代表的是：一個看不到性別的特徵，所有能代表特定性別的展現都沒辦法被觀察到。可能有一點點接近無性別，但是也不同，不是沒有性別，而是沒有能展現性別的特徵。
如此特定且窄小的字眼，要如何做一本雜誌呢？即使定義了這個字，又代表了什麼？這個字要怎麼成為一個雜誌的主題？這個概念是怎麼被大眾解釋的，又代表了哪個部分？所有的問題我們都沒有一個明確得解答，最後我們把這個概念分成四個部分，且每個部分都用一個字來當作一種分類：Transcendence 意指為超越，或是更上一層樓；Revitalisation 意指為重新賦予生命；Ambiguity 意指為曖昧不清；最後是 Liberation 意指為自由解放。
在這四個分類下，我們找了所有我們有辦法聯絡的藝術家，攝影師，時尚設計師，平面設計師，彩妝師等等的。在他們的作品中找到跟該分類相對應的進行訪談且寫一篇文章放在雜誌中。當時怎麼想也不會覺得我們最後做出來的雜誌有 90 頁。當時只有兩個月的時間從零開始這個企劃，這也只是這個學期的一門課之一而已，最後成為我最喜歡的課，既有挑戰性，也讓我們有機會自己做出這個作品。一個我們都很驕傲的，獨特，新穎的作品。
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| Uni project in 2015 |
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| The content page of More magazine |
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| content of magazine |
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| content of magazine |
Before the MA project, the other project I did as my BA final project is called 'More', which was a magazine based on cites rather than time. We made an NYC edition, and looking back, it was so rough, so raw, so inexperienced. I suppose that is acceptable as my first ever magazine project. Me and my two other team mates made the whole thing in a couple months and it felt so good seeing your own work become real. At the time, my style of graphic designs were more busy, the composition of each frame was too much for my current liking. From some of the content pages, there are some traces that you can spot some mistakes I made.
I remember that when I was doing these two projects, I felt really stressed and didn't enjoy the process, and I asked myself: why do I keep making magazines? I thought that was what I wanted to do, and I felt so much pressure and dreadfulness, then why do I keep making magazines and worked for Marie Claire?
I know the answer, it's because I love it so much that I wanted to do it right, and I realised that it was the 'type two happiness' which means that you wouldn't be completely enjoying the whole process, but after you've done it, IT FEELS SO GOOD. A little bit like working out, it was tiring and you felt like you couldn't do it, but you always can, and you like it.
From that moment, I know that I will always love fashion magazine, and I am really glad that I have decided that this will always be part of my life.
Giselle
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除了我的碩士作品以外，我跟大學的朋友一起做的企劃叫做More，是個以城市為基礎的雜誌，所有的內容也是以該城市為出發點，那個時候做的第一本是紐約市的。現在往回看，發現很多的平面設計做的不是很好。我想，如果你能回頭看自己的作品，然後發現可以改進的地方，就代表你已經進步了。
跟我現在的平面設計取向比起來，當年的我更愛豐富的頁面，什麼都要擠滿，看得出來急躁地想把所有會的東西都放上去的感覺。現在我比較喜歡有一點留白的設計。
我印象我當時在做碩士的企劃的時候，我每天都覺得壓力很大，也覺得自己快被自己逼死了，那個過程談不上享受，感覺像在一艘疾駛的船上，沒辦法下來。我當時問自己說：明明我以為我喜歡的東西，好像也沒那麼喜歡，那我為什麼要一直做雜誌呢？我真的不懂。
後來我知道答案了，因為我真的很愛這一切，太想要把它做好。我意識到說這是一個“第二類快樂”，也就是說：這個快樂並不是大口吃肉的那種立即的歡快感，反而是一個過程艱辛，最後爽快的收穫的成就感。就像去健身房運動一樣，當時會覺得很累，很想放棄，但是結束後全身暢快淋漓，而且成就感十足的任務一樣。
在那之後，我就知道時尚雜誌永遠都會是我的一部分，不管我的工作跟他的關聯性有多少，這個造就了我的熱情，從大學到現在一路走來一樣的熱情不減，會在我的人生中繼續下去。
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